Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Why was the swing in the kitchen?

What's a skeleton's favorite type of music? Nothing. Skeletons are just the decomposed remains of a being that was once living.

If frogs weren't alive, there wouldn't be any frogs left on earth.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a car.

What did Jesus say to his disciples at the Last Supper? Go to Hell.

Why did the eighty year old man climb into a fridge? Because he wanted to.

Roses are red Dead bodies are blue You can't see me But I see you

What did Chuck Norris say to the boy? Sure I'll sign your t-shirt!

Q: What would you do for a Klondike bar? A: I would make the slightly onerous journey to the local grocery establishment and pay my hard-earned money to procure a dessert which I quite enjoy.

The NHL playoffs

Darude - Sandstorm

What did the deaf, dumb, blind, parapalegic kid get for Christmas? Cancer

A rabbit enters in apharmacy and asks for a carrot. The man says:"There aren´t any carrots in here." In the next two days the same happens, but the man replies that he'll hammer the rabbit if he comes back. In the other day, the rabbit is found dead with a bloody hammer nearby.

Why did the all the fish in the lake die? A pesticide bioaccumulated through the food chain.

What is worse than finding 10 dead babies nailed to a tree? Finding 1 dead baby nailed to 10 trees.

Yo mamma's so black, and that's ok. We're all different and unique.

A man walked into a store and asked if he could use the restroom. They found this acceptable and let him use it.

What do you call it when 1 person has an imaginary friend? A mental disorder. What do you call it when 1 billion people have an imaginary friend? A Religion.

September 8, 2011 Amy Winehouse: 46 days sober. Date of death: July 23, 2011

What happens when you have fish and a rhino mate? Nothing, that is physically impossible, a rhino is a lot bigger than a fish and it would not be possible for a rhino to do that with a fish considering a rhino can't breathe under water and a fish can't breath with out air.

Why was there a lion in the bathroom? Because I threw a refrigerator at it and stapled a frog to its butthole, all while it was being chased by a 10 foot scorpion and a purple salmon that only had 1 eye.

Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

Roses are red, violets are blue something stinks and I think it's you!

Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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