What do you sit on, sleep on and brush your teeth with? A chair, a bed, and a toothbrush

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If I crash my car, how many trees does it take to cover my yard in orange juice, yellow, because a cat pissed on my foot.

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why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. Why did the man get a check in the mail every month? Cause he's black Why did Obama Cross the road? Cause he lost control of congress

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm horny and your bodily figure is very attractive Get naked

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Q: What sucks? A: Straws

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why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. What do you call a man who gets a check in the mail every month for nothing? black

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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How does a plumber cross the street? Using his legs

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whos gay? you are

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what do you call a shoe with legs? roadrunners.

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Wanna hear an oxymoron? Jews for Jesus.

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A man with AIDS walks into a bar, what does he say? I have AIDS

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How do you stop a plane? Throw flying birds at it.

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There is a white man, a black guy, and an Asian in a car. It got into an accident who did it? Asian dude

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Whats pink and fluffy? Pink Fluff.

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Sit on Santas lap Boner

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What do you call a Mexican from Cancun? A cholo.

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A man walks into a bar. He hit his head so hard that he went into a coma.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Hitler. Good.

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I used to fit trough doors, but then I got tall... I used to play with other babies, but then I got tall... (daradadadadan) I used to look up to you, but then I got tall (OH YEAH!) but then I got tall, but then I got tall, but then I got tall! Moral: Censorship should be illegal.

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knock knock who's there?

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Q. What do you call a black pilot A. A pilot

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When does 1=17? How many schizophrenics does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

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So a man walks into a bar and says to the bartender I'll have a beer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops