math test 2=2

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What did Jeff say to the guy who stole his car? Can I have my car back.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens do not possess the mental capacity to grasp the idea of "roads"

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you know what hurts.... PAIN

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What did the deaf guy say to the other deaf guy? What?

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What's the same between a plum and a rabbit? They are both purple, except for the rabbit.

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My wife crashed the car while listening to Adele last night. She ended up rolling in the jeep.

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Why was the baby upset? Because it accidentally killed its twin brother by pushing it off the bed.

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What does a cupcake get for Christmas? A fat kid.

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Roses are red Violets are red Trees are red Shrubs are red HOLY SHIT! MY YARD IS ON FIRE!

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Yo mama's so fat that when she was diagnosed with a flesh eating disease she was given 10 years to live.

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What do airplanes and grapes have in common? They both have wings, except a grape doesn't.

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Roses are red, violets are red, daffodils are yellow, and pansies are pink.

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What did the black man, chinese man, and mexican man all have in common? They all happened to enjoy cantaloupe.

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, " I forgot to store nuts for winter and now I am dead." Its funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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democracy

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What is Helen Keller's dogs name? She had fish.

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How come Pluto and Goofy are both dogs, but Goofy can talk and Pluto can't? Goofy sold Pluto into slavery in exchange for the power of human speech.

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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How do Ethiopians celebrate Christmas? They don't there to worried about dying from Aids and starvation

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Why is amouse afraid of cheese? Because they usually die when they get it

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Why was Timmy sad?

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Tommy has no arms and legs. What did he get for Christmas? Cancer

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How do you find the population of Mexico? You take a census count by mail and/or a door to door questionnaire.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops