What's better than winning a Gold Medal in the Special Olympics? Not being handicapped in the first place.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What did the computer say to the other computer? Nothing, computers can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Can Helen Keller keep a secret? No, she didn't hear it in the first place

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What has 4 eyes but can't see? A blind man wearing glasses.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

B: Laro tayo . G: Anong laro ? B: Taguan . G: Bakit ngayon pa ? B: Because tonight will be the night that i will fall for you . G: Ulet ? B: Over again . G: Wag na ! B: Don't make me change my mind . G: Bukas na lang . B: I won't live to see another day . G: Weh ? Di nga ? B: I swear its true . G: Bakit kasi taguan pa ? B: Because a girl like you is impossible to find . G: Ano ? B: You're impossible to find . ? :)

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What do you get when you divide 60000 by 30? A Number

thumb_up thumb_down +27

How do you confuse a blonde? Tell her an anti joke

thumb_up thumb_down +27

There once was a man from Nantucket, whose dick was so long he could provide women with more pleasure than the average male.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why is there no African food restaurants in America? Because Africa doesnt have food to begin with

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A guy and a girl look at a dog licking his crotch and the guy utters "damn I wish I could do that" The girl says: I can totally do that! "really? prove it" the guy says. The girl walks towards the dog and says "you just need to pet him so he don't bite you"

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What do you call a sandwich that has sandwich on it? A sandwich.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? Its socially acceptable to sit on a bench.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

How do you get a giraffe in a fridge? Open the Door, put the giraffe in, close the door How do you get an elephant in a fridge Open the door, take the giraffe out, put the elephant in, close the door There is an animal meeting, one animal doesn't show up. Which animal didn't come? The Elephant, it's still in the fridge You come across a crocodile infested river, how do you get across? You swim across, the crocodiles are at the meeting, Weren't you listening?

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Roses are bright, Violets are sad, I like sprite I'm really struggling for ideas at this point

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Your mother

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Q:whats yellow and flys through walls A:A magical Banana

thumb_up thumb_down +25

There is a tiger in front of you a lion behind you and a bear beside you what do you do? Get of the marry go round

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why are we on a roof? Becuse some idiot gave us all roofies.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A blind man walks into a bar....and a chair....and a table....and a wall....and a person... etc.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

- I did your mom last night! - Thanks, Dad.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

How do you put 100 babys in a bucket? A blender

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did Doris want to father children? Because she wanted to have a fry-up with the leftover baby oil

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did the man do when he saw there was water spilled on his desk? He waited two hours for it to evaporate because he was too lazy to wipe it up.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

hey.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops