What's the difference between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a lamborghini in my garage.

How is the difference between a door? Its a chicken, because they don't have wheels.

Why was the boy sad? Because he wasn't happy!

Yo mama's so fat that when she was diagnosed with a flesh eating disease she was given 10 years to live.

What is worse than a Catholic priest being caught red handed raping 7 kids? 1. Thou shall not steal. 2. Thou shall be kindeth to thy neigbour... 3. Not attending to church is a sin... Moral: Catholic priests need to get their priorities straight... or gay, just not pedo!

Behind every fat girl is a beautiful woman. No, seriously. Get out of the way.

What does mens "man sauce" and babies have in common? They're both fun to make and easy to kill...

What did the cat say to the dog? "Meow."

Roses are red Violets are blue who are you kidding, violets are violet

Why the girl fell from the swing? cause she had no arms

Women's sports

Knock Knock, Who's there? The Police. *No Answer* The police then give the S.W.A.T the signal, bust down the door, and kill 15 high profile targets issued by Liberia. The man who did not answer the door was Carlos Pedrouez, a serial killer, meth addict who has been apart of the Arizona sex slave trade for over a decade. The world can now sleep softly. The door was also red.

Shortest Joke in the World? Well, just look down.

why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 8 9

Shit happens. Correction: feces happens.

A blonde walks into an electronics store. She asks the clerk how much a television costs. He said that they don't serve blondes. The blonde files a lawsuit and is victorious by ruling of descrimination.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? -Hey! Where's my tractor?

how many babies can you fit in a bass drum? 19.

What do people do in France when they are hungry? Get something to eat.

Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

Twisty Snake bite: Doctors office. Patient: Err Doc, a snake bit me in the err, private area... Doctor: I must suck out the poison immediately! Patient: What? Man! Are you sick? How do I even know if the snake was poisonous? Besides they only do that crap in bad jokes! Doctor: Yeah but this is an anti joke so drop em! Later at home: Wife: So did the Doctor help you dear? Patient: Worst doctor ever, he really sucked!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it noticed that there may be foodstuffs on other side.

What did the racist wife give to her black husband on their anniversary? Golf clubs because he liked to golf.

Romney 2012

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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