Q.Why did the chicken cross the road? A.forty-two

What's red, loose, and easy to wear? A rock. I lie about everything.

Yo mamma is so nice, when she bakes a batch of cookies, there's enough for everybody.

If you asked an alzheimer's patient what the meaning of life is, what answer would you get? Probably an answer that doesn't respond to the question but is bound to be hilarious.

How do you piss off a female archeologist? Kill her dog.

Wanna hear an oxymoron? Jews for Jesus.

I can't stand 9/11 jokes Their just plane wrong!

What is more tragic than a nice day wasted? Obesity.

Billy is walking down the street when he spots 1 armed johnny hanging in a tree.Billy proceeds to wave causing Johnny to wave with his 1 arm. Johnny falls out of the tree and dies

Do you have a curfew? No its saturday!

a seal walks into a bar. replace "bar" with "club". and replace "walks into" with "gets bludgeon by."

How do you keep a blonde occupied for hours? Put on an entertaining movie.

Why did the cow have to travel everywhere by an electric scooter? It had motor neurone disease.

why did the chicken cross the street? it didn't.

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They gave here a timeout, like any other sensible parent would.

slow down! you move too fast. you gotta make the morning last. just tripping down the cobblestones. looking for fun and feeling grovvy.

Why did John scream when he came in to his bedroom? He stepped on a nail

What's so sad about a bus with mentally handicapped children falling off a cliff? There was one empty seat.

Polly went out for a cigarette. Then she was raped.

A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

i would like to know if the rumors about the moon being made out of chees is true because nobody told me it was CC

What does wasabi spell backwards? Ibasaw

How do you pleasure your grandmother? Ask your brother

There's some good news and some bad news. The bad news is there isn't any good news.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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