Why does an elephant lay on it's back with its feet in the air? To trip birds.

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Why did the group of black men not get paid for all of their manual labor? It was the early 1800's.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was tied to the first one.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to its dying chicks who were just run over.

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A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

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Why didn't suzie go to school yesterday? She was brutally hacked into pieces and now she"ll never experience school again

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Q: What would you do for a Klondike bar? A: I would make the slightly onerous journey to the local grocery establishment and pay my hard-earned money to procure a dessert which I quite enjoy.

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Why do Mexicans like to eat burritos? Because they are delicious, and very filling.

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biggest lie in the world. I love you grandma.

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind, parapalegic kid get for Christmas? Cancer

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A horse walks into a bar... it was accompanied by a blind man for it was a seeing eye pony and the bartender who was not tolerant to blind people turned away the man causing him to recieve dirty glances from the kindly patrons of the bar.

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Why did the all the fish in the lake die? A pesticide bioaccumulated through the food chain.

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What's worse than biting into your apple and realising it has a worm in it? subsequently realising that the worm is a Swamp Adder, the worlds smallest venemous snake. Then you look up and realise you're in the Sahara Desert. You wonder where the snake came from and how it got in the apple.. Then you slowly die.

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why did the chicken cross the road. why? because he felt like it

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What do you do if Zombies are chasing you and your friend? Trip the friend.

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A boy eats 3 pounds of candy, 2 whole pizzas, and drinks 10 beers. Why did he puke? Someone came out of nowhere, and kicked him in the nuts

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Darude - Sandstorm

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A boy in Bible class was poking a girl in front of him with a pencil. Atfer, maybe ten minutes of this, she was asked "Sarah, what did Eve say to Adam after they had had twenty-seven children" The boy poked her with the pencil again. She stood up, and said "I think we have enough kids Adam."

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A:what happens when you throw a black guy down from a sky-scraper Q:he dies

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Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really pissed. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!" The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough it was car. The End

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Oh hot damn, this is my jam. Strawberry, to be specific.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a car.

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Why did Hitler like his steak well done? Because like many people, he didn't like the sight of blood in his steaks.

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Chuck Norris watches TV.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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