What happen to the boy who poured water on his head? He got wet.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Is this a chair?

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Three men are walking on a beach when they find a lamp. They rub it, and a genie comes out. It tells them that they each get one wish, and to choose wisely. They each decide to discuss what to wish for with their wives. Their wives take them to a local hospital, where they receive treatment for hallucinations.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the woman buy her husband? Nothing, she's a widow.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing, he's Jewish.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

your mom is so poor that she is unable to pay for your child care leaving you to have a terrible childhood, troubled adolescence, and eventually lie passed out in an alley after OD'ing off of heroin.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what is the difference between oral sex and anal sex? one has to deal with a butt

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is black, white, and red all over? An interracial couple being murdered

thumb_up thumb_down +8

call of duty is how they say it, calla duty is how we say it...

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why can't the dinosaur eat M&M's? He is dead. He used to rule the Earth 65 Million years ago, though. Dinosaurs are reptiles. Whales are not. Meow?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a group of black people? You don't You call the cops first.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

jeremie er en ape hvorfor er han det? Who cares!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats the different between a black man and white man...... the different levels melanin in the skin that results in pigment

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the guy do with the tv remote? Turn on the tv

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A drunk man walks out of a bar, goes home and abuses his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

why did the chicken cross the road? its a chicken so it will wonder when not properly fenced in

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the man say when he turned on his car? AAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHHHH!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a large dog on its side of the road attempting to harass it.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why was the black man running away from the cops? He was running a relay race.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

When Life gives you lemons, Make Orange Juice!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. Why did the man get a check in the mail every month? Cause he's black Why did Obama Cross the road? Cause he lost control of congress

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you do when you see a one legged black man? Stop laughing and reload.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q: why couldn't the pirate boy get into the movie? A: the movie was rated R and the pirate boy was only 14 years old, and he didn't have any adult supervision, which prevented him from entering the movie.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops