What did the cat say to the dog? "Meow."

why did the man paint his house? because he never wanted to paint his house

What happens when you stab a black man? An equal race rights protest.

How does Michael J. Fox like his Martini? With an Olive

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

Why was Little Susie's IQ less than 30? Because, she is mentally retarted.

1, 2, buckle my shoe. 3, 4, shut the door. 5, 6, I'm gonna to cut you in your sleep.

I still remember the last words my grandpa said to me before he kicked the bucket. He said, "Hey. how far do you think I can kick this bucket."

What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino? Photoshop

Why did Hellen Keller get hit by a car? She didn't see it coming. (TD)

Justin Beiber does not have a really good voice.

A blind man walks into a bar....and a chair....and a table....and a wall....and a person... etc.

Why'd Sally fall of the swing She had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not sally

Why did the small child fall down the stairs? Because he had lung cancer was in a wheel chair and I was incredibly tempted to push him down the stairs.

There once was a man from Nantucket, whose dick was so long he could provide women with more pleasure than the average male.

Q: What did the hobo get for his birthday? A: Older.

Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy but get in the van

What is a question?

Why are black people so good at sports? Because there black.

Why is there no African food restaurants in America? Because Africa doesnt have food to begin with

How many wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None. They prefer digging burrows for hibernation.

What is the best time to go to the dentist? During office hours 2 or 3 times a year to ensure optimal dental health and hygiene .

what do you call an icy road? dangerous.

A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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