Why can't an elephant smoke cigarettes? They do not posses the fine motor skills.

Ask me if I´m an orange. Are you an orange? No I? a person.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens do not possess the mental capacity to grasp the idea of "roads"

Why did the family go to Mexico? Because they were deported

What did the deaf guy say to the other deaf guy? What?

baby loves lalma

What's the worst thing a 13 year old could do? Have their Bar Mitzvah in Nazi Germany.

Ken: Your dog is sick, he needs to see a vet. Megan: Omg, what is it? Ken: It's a medical person who treats animals.

a redheaded man walks into a bar. he is wanted for raping and murdering 13 children

BWAT

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

A fish swims into a wall. Says dam.

A man was building a new kitchen for his wife. Just as he was installing the sink, his wife comes running into the kitchen and starts cursing. "What's the matter?" he asks. "Don't you like the new sink?" His wife replies, "I love it. But come quick, there's a spider in the living room!" The man walks over with a paper towel, grabs the spider, and throws it into the garbage. The wife looks at the husband, smiling, and says, "Thanks."

Q:Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple A:You have AIDS

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

Two goldfish are sat in a tank, one says to the other 'I forgot who you are' to which the other replies 'I forgot what you said'.

1, 2, buckle my shoe. 3, 4, shut the door. 5, 6, I'm gonna to cut you in your sleep.

Chapter 6 : The pimp ``scooby`` tells how delivered the poor young people to people with money.

What did the cat say to the dog? "Meow."

What did the racist slave owner do when his slave refused to complete his task? Asked him nicely until the task was completed.

Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

What comes to mind when you say the word "Mind?" Your Mind

How do you kill a dinosaur? You don't. It's already dead.

There are two fish in a bathtub. One turns to the other and says "Could you please pass the soap?" The other one says "What do I look like to you, a typewriter?"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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