why did Max cry??? chicken

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really desperate to get laid guy gives out phone number in random places 5802352343 :D

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What's the best part of having a doctor for a best friend? The sex.

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A really hot girl walks past 2 guys and the following conversation is produced... Guy1:damn! look at that ass! Guy2:yep I bet shit comes from that thing! When's the last time she had diarrhea?!

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Why did a lady get in a car crash? Because woman don't drive, they stay in the kitchen!

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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What did the computer say to the other computer? Nothing, computers can't talk

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What's the difference between peanut butter and jam? Peanut butter is a food paste made primarily from dry roasted peanuts, while jam is a product made with whole fruit, that is cut into pieces or crushed.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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roses are red, violets are blue, charcoal is black, and my neighbor is too.

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25

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Du bist mein Kampf

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What do you call Justin Beiber having sex with a woman? Gay

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Why do black people call white people "Niggas"? Because they took an overdose of KFC and watermelon, they're actually just insulting themselves.

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whats orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, it is unclear what the chicken's motivation to cross the road was.

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Hickory Dickory Dock mother is a whore

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Knock knock Who's there? Alzhiemers guy Alzhiemers guy who? Knock knock

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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Mice don't have the strength required to do that.

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viki has 10 penises around her she eats 8 of them what does viki have? viki has AIDS

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What do a duck and an elephant have in common? They're both yellow. Except for the elephant.

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What was the dying Raccoons last words? I don't want to die.

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How did the bald lady die? Of cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops