What wears a white robe and shines? A special boar.

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Why did the spider cross the road? He was stapled to the chickens back.

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.""-. |a a \ \ / | '-') ; _/ /_ .'/ ; '. / / |'. \ | | '._\ | | | | | \ \_ _.// jgs '._`""`_.' `""`

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Three kids are standing on a corner. They have red hair, blue hair, and green hair respectively. A man asks the kid with red hair "How did you get your hair red?" The kid replies, "I dyed it." The man then asks the kid with blue hair, "How did you get your hair blue?" The kid replies, "I dyed it." The man finally asks the kid with green hair, "How did you get your hair green?" The kid wipes his hand across his nose, gathering green slime and replies, "I dyed it."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it saw an eatable life form.

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If you added up all of the grains of sand in all the beaches of the world, how many would there be? Anyone?

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That's Racist

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Whats the worst part about being fat? Your fat.

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My friends are like trampolines I have none

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A seal walks into a club.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? You poker face.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: 9/11

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Can you see this brett? Connor

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A bear walks into a bar. Four people were taken to the hospital and there was one fatality.

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A blonde read the newspaper the other day and she saw "Sarah Piplin-laid by 5000 men" She reported it to the owner of the company as I felt it was not appropriate for a family newspaper. The person at the other end of the line asked the blonde, "are you blonde?" "Yes, how do you know?" she replied. "Because it says Sahara Pipeline, you idiot!"

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she was blind and deaf.

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Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar.... Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece? Man 1: Were the hell did you come from? Homo-sexual Panda: My mother's uterus same as you, retard.

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Q: Who won the fight of two black guys and a white guy? A: The black and white guy because two is better than one.

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A jew, a catholic and an atheist are in the desert. They see a dusty lamp. They take it and rub it. Once the lamp is clean, they put it back on the sand and kep walking.

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THere was three bees eating Honeynut cherrios one of them had a speech impediment.

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Q:Why couldn't the baby walk down the hall way? A: It had a javelin stuck in its head.

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You know whats funnier than 24? What? 25.

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Will my son live, doctor? No because you don't have a son and I am not a doctor

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Whats black and has wheels a black man i lied about the wheels

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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