whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff. whats blue and fluffy? pink fluff holding its breath.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wish you were here, To get to the other side!

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Why did he walk the dinosaur He took an arrow to the knee so much the DJ didn't was paper-plates.

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What's worse than getting one of your hands cut off? Getting both of your hands cut off.

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why did the cookie go to the docter he felt crumpie

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If olive oil is made of olives, calculate the mass of the sun.

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Why can't Amy Winehouse drive? She is dead.

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What did the woman do when her husband told her to make him a sandwich? She made him a sandwich promptly.

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Q: What do you call a plane with no wings? A: An unfinished plane.

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What happens when you push an asian in a hole? He falls in

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What did the cannibal eat for Christmas. Your Mom!

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How is it possible for a man to get raped? Easy. He lied.

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A soccer player, a basketball player, a football player, a hockey player, and a baseball player all walk into a bar at different time periods of the day

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A blonde read the newspaper the other day and she saw "Sarah Piplin-laid by 5000 men" She reported it to the owner of the company as I felt it was not appropriate for a family newspaper. The person at the other end of the line asked the blonde, "are you blonde?" "Yes, how do you know?" she replied. "Because it says Sahara Pipeline, you idiot!"

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Three children are celebrating Christmas, Joey got a toy train, Janey got a barbie doll, Know what Jimmy got??? Cancer.

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Kah-________-

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? None, cus feminists can't change shit.

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Question: How many rocks does it take to make a pancake? Answer: Tree.

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Two chemists walk into a bar. The first says, "I'd like some H2O" The second says "I'd like some H2O as well." Nobody dies.

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What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

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Why did Johnny buy the strawberry ice cream? Because when he gets the chocolate he vomits and bleeds out of his asshole.

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What is the way to a woman's heart? Through her chest cavity.

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What's the difference between black people and dog shit? One of them eventually turns white and stops smelling.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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