what r the two best ways to describe a guy whose eating a bannana while peeing, time conservative and a multitasker

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You best friend has a bladder disease. You ask him how he got it. He says " I was watching the superbowl and had to go, but I didn't want to miss the commercials. So it was either watching the game and getting a bladder disease that would end up killing me or going to the bathroom . Now you know where i went wrong."

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- Knock Knock - who's there? - Gestapo! open the door!

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Q:What kind of pizza did the World Trade Center order? A:Two Plains

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What is worse

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My mother-in-law is so fat that I sometimes worry my wife will look just like her after she gives birth.

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Why did tigger look in the toilet? Because he dropped his phone fell in.

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Why did the Nazi not help the black man up after he had been badly injured? The Nazi was in a wheelchair.

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How many Jews can you fit into a car? Well, it depends on how many Jews there are and what kind of car it is.

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Your Mom

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What is black but also yellow? A song.

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who eats pencils asians

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What's up? A direction...

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Two Jews are on their way to the giant oven, one looks back at the other in fear and says, "I think I overcooked the lasagna."

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Bob: What's gucci bro Tim: Is that a company?

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How do you insult a Canadian? You just swear at them and hope for the best.

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where do cows go on dates? the slaughter house

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How come Michael Jackson can draw a perfect circle? He likes little BOYS.

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did you know the leading cause of funerals is death?

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OBAMA

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 17

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Whats Green and has wheels? Grass, I was kidding about the wheels.

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You smell bad? Cool.

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Hey I just met you,and this is crazy,please stand up,if you're the real slim shady.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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