What's as bad as doing something you don't like? Doing another thing you don't like

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A man calls customer service. A man in India helps him with his problem.

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If a tree falls in the woods does it make a sound? No, the impact of the colliding objects being the tree and the ground causes a disturbance in the silence thus causing a sound. The tree gets too much credit.

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A man walks into a bar. He is an alcoholic and it's ruining his life.

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What do you call a dead cat on the side of the road? Kitty litter

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whats the difference between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? i don't have a lamborghini in my garage.

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You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but you can't rob a bank. That's a felony.

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Q: What's black and can crash into you A: a black guy in a car

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Whats better than finding a hot girl in your room? nothing

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was disturbed by two black men raping a young girl with leukemia.

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Why are Jewish men circumcised? Because it is the norm with that particular religious group to circumcise male infants shortly after birth.

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Lol, thats sweet, you making me nervous in a good way now. No, the thing is that I need to use this crap every morning, yeah, but its late here now, and since I was born with this condition, remembering is far easier than forgetting, and while the bleeding has stopped now, I was never in any pain whatsoever, and the bleeding would have stopped eventually because of you know... Coagulation? But, if I lets say spend a week without my meds, things would look pretty ugly. I get the meds for cheap, by my new doctor since the old one was a bitch... Excuse me, can we take five minutes? I know I said I would return last time and did not, but I will, I am just a bit... Well, I need a bit more blood in my body right now, I am fine, no danger... If I where I would not be chatting here, but getting my ass of to the doc.

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C'est l'histoire d'un français paumé qui se retrouve sur un site anglais.

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Your moms so dumb she stuffed a battery up her butt and said i got the POWA!

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Why did the rabbit cross the road? ..It was stapled to the chicken.

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There was a girl who dumped her diver boyfriend because she couldn’t get him to give her a pearl out of an oyster. This particularly female has rather high expectations for her significant others.

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so an american, a Hispanic, and a Indian walk into a bar in Washington D.C, and the bartender says to the american "I'm sorry, but u have to leave.

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What Do You Call A Man On Land With No Arms And Legs? Useless

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What do you get when you cross a Shake Weight with Parkinson's Disease? You get a sentence that doesn't explain the end of the joke and leaves you without any closure.

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Why does an elephant lay on it's back with its feet in the air? To trip birds.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I was lying about the wheels.

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What's the best anti joke? this one

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Three men walk into a Bar.... You'd have thought at least one of them would have seen it !

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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