"Knock, Knock" "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock, Knock" "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock, Knock" "Who's there?" "The police. We're looking for three escaped inmates posing as bananas."

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What do you call a guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

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Why did the bunny eat his food

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens do not possess the mental capacity to grasp the idea of "roads"

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What did Grandma give her grandson Billy for Christmas? Scarring memories of sexual abuse.

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There once was a beautiful princess named Snow White who lived with seven dwarves in the forest. One day, and old hag approached her and offered her an apple. She bit into the apple, chewed, and said,"Wow, that's tasty. Is this a Golden Delicious?" The hag said, "Why yes, it is. I have a private orchard. Perhaps I'll let you see it some time." The two promptly resumed their lives.

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Two gay guys go into a bedroom, in different houses at different times.

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Wanna hear something half funny 34.5

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What did you say? I don't know.

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What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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A Holocaust joke? I did Nazi that coming...Anne, Frankly, I'm quite offended.

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What's big, white and can't climb a tree? A refrigerator.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a wild dog on the other side, so he crossed the road to avoid potential danger.

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What did the German say to the Jew? I'm not quite sure; I don't speak German.

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Q:What did the policemen say to the other policemen? A:Safe

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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A plane crashes on the border of the United States and Canada. Where do they bury the survivors? Why would they bury the survivors? THEY'RE ALIVE

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What did the tourist in Africa get? A souvenior.

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How do you find the population of Mexico? You take a census count by mail and/or a door to door questionnaire.

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Womens' rights.

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Q: How many cantaloupes can you fit into Jackie Chan's basement? A: 4

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How big is Justin Bieber's penis? 10 inches, and its in his ass, and its actually Usher's penis

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What if I told you that our role our "little team" is not as little as you think?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops