What's Worse then an apple with a worm? The holocaust

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sticks and stones may break my bones but cataracts will prohibit you from eyesight

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well no one really knows for sure

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What did Jeff say to the guy who stole his car? Can I have my car back.

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I used to think I was indecisive, but now I am not so sure.

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Life is like a box of chocolates. You eat them. get fat. Die.

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My aunt used to say slow and steady wins the race she died in a fire

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why cant sophie lifeguard safely because she cant swim that good

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Why do all black people have nightmares? Beacause we killed the only one with a dream..

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Why wasn't Justin Bieber allowed in the men's bathroom? It was closed for maintenance.

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Why couldn't Larry walk his dog? Larry doesn't have a dog.

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There once was a man from Bangkok, who hated limericks.

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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How many years old is Chuck Norris? The same amount of years that it has been since he was born.

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First kid: my name is bob second kid: ok First kid: Now tell me what my name is?? second kid: bob First kid: HOW did you know???

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why did the mans hair start to get shorter the barber was shaving it!

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What is so sad about 5 black people going over a cliff in a Cadaliac? That was my Cadaliac

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What do you call a one eyed hippo? A do-you-think-he-potamus

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Why did the blind man commit suicide? Cause his wife was so ugly he went blind and become depressed a shot himself...twice.

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How are Steve Jobs and The iPhone the same? They got progressively thinner over time.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? -Hey! Where's my tractor?

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who can jump higher than mount everest? anyone. mount everest cant jump

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Two black people fall off a cliff, who hits the ground first? Who Cares?

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A blonde is a Homo sapien (Latin for knowing man), a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans . A mosquito on the other hand is a common insect in the family Culicidae (from the Latin culex meaning midge or gnat).

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops