What did the fox say to the blonde? "Hello". The girl then captured the fox and sold it to the government.

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Why did the boy hate his bicycle and soccer ball he got for Christmas? The boy didn't have legs. He also hated sports. By the way he was black but that doesn't matter, he still hated sports. Who in the right mind would give a cripple inappropriate toys? Probably a racist Santa Claus. Oh by the way, Santa Claus is not real. So did they return the presents after the boy found out what it was? Yes, and it turns out the boy got a guitar and piano instead. Too bad the boy is also deaf.

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Two Jewish kids walked into a bar... mitzvot.

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knock knock whos there a duck a duck who QUACK!

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"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "I already asked ''Banana who?'' Is that your real name? Who is this really?" "Knock Knock." "You are upsetting me. I am calling the police now. Please get off my property."

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What happened? I have absolutely no idea.

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Steven hawking drives into a bar Disability

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Two robots walk into a bar, just kidding, they have Polio.

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A scottish and a mexican were walking on the streets when the mexican got hit by a car. The scottish man called the ambulance and walkked away.

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Why Was my mommy gone last night? -cause I ****ed her

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Woman: If you were my husband, I've give you poisoned wine. Winston Churchill: Madame, if you were my wife, I would hope we could have enough love to attempt marriage counseling so as to work out these issues.

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A tall German man and a short Ukrainian woman walk into a pub and sit down for a drink. The German, not wanting to seem rude, asks the Ukrainian how her day has been. The Ukrainian smiles confusedly as she doesn't understand German.

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Knock Knock It's Open!

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Why did the man not get home to his loving family? He blew up.

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How does a pig go to the hospital? Through the front door.

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Knock Knock Come in

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Make an effort in life whenever you want. Fight trough life when you got no other choice.

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Knock knock! Who's there? The police. There was a severe accident not long ago. Your family are dead.

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What is black, white, and red all over A penguin in a blender

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If I crash my car, how many trees does it take to cover my yard in orange juice, yellow, because a cat pissed on my foot.

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How many Jews can you fit into a car? Well, it depends on how many Jews there are and what kind of car it is.

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Whats pink and fluffy? Pink Fluff.

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Q: Why did the plane crash into a mountain? A: The pilot was a tomato.

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Whats the difference between a van with a bunch of babies in the back and a Cadillac with a bunch of babies in the back I don't have a Cadillac in my garage

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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