Why'd the first koala fall out of the tree? He died. Why'd the second koala fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first koala. Why'd the third koala fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game. Why'd the refrigerator fall out of the tree? He thought he was a koala. Why'd the boy fall off the swing? He was hit by 3 koalas and a refrigerator. Why'd the boy fall off his bike? He had no arms or legs

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why was the girl stupid? She didn't pay attention in school because everyone was making fun of her blonde hair.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do you call a bicycle that likes threesomes. A tricycle

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why didn't the black man pay for his child support bills? He made some unwise financial decisions in the past and is working three part time jobs just to stay afloat.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How do Ethiopians celebrate Christmas? They don't there to worried about dying from Aids and starvation

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask them politely to turn down their volume.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

An asian walks out of math class

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A guy named Dick goes into a bar and the barman says: - "hey, show my your dick" - "show you my what?" asks Dick. - "your dick!" - "oh! no, I'm shy"

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How do you know if it's to late to turn your homework in? When the time allotted is up.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A) why did the black guy leave the bar B) cause he was tired and wanted to go home

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Your mama is so stupid she had to go back to school to get her GED in order to get a job that could properly support her family.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A woman is home washing her dishes when she suddenly slips banging her head on a cabinet. She passed out for a few seconds, then woke to find a great gash on her left cheek, fairly spurting blood. At the emergency room, the doctor asks, "How did this happen?" The woman replied, "My boy friend tried to drown me."

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you call a can of beans? A can of beans.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Knock knock? Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock knock? Who's there? Orange. Orange WHO? Knock knock? WHO'S THERE?! Orange Williams. Sorry, I suffer from debilitating OCD.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the grandson inherit when his grandmother died? Nothing, they both were killed in a tragic car accident.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you call a horse, a cow, a pig, a sheep, a dog, a cat, and a mouse all walking in a straight line? Animals

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: What did one tube of glue say to the other tube of glue? A:Nothing. They're tubes of glue. Inanimate objects, such as a tube of glue, however adhesive the contents of said object is, are not capable of advanced speech, let alone basic communication.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A bear walks into a bar. Four people were taken to the hospital and there was one fatality.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

how do you kill an African baby ? put it in the microwave for roughly 45 minutes

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you get when you cross a lion with a rhinoceros? A trip to the hospital and animal cruelty charges.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What happened to truck full of watermelons careening down the hill? After panicking, the driver was able to gain composure, and shifting the truck into a lower gear, was able to deliver the track safely to the side of the road at the bottom of the ill, where he sat down alongside of the road under the shade of an apple tree, sucking on delicious watermelon.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

The French guy and the Italian guy got in the bar at the same time, but they didn't talk as they didn't know each other.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How do you starve a black family? Hide there government assistance card under their work boots!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops