What is the same about a girrafe, and an ant? They are both REALLY tall. Except for the ant, sorry I lied.

How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it. How do you make it stop crying? You throw another brick at it.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was an animal of minimal intelligence and didn't know of the underlining risks involved in crossing a high speed passage for cars and other road baring vehicles, the presence of the chicken in the road also prompted further danger for the drivers involved in the situation. This resulted ultimately in not only the death of the chicken in hand, but also caused two cars, one with a male driver aged 35 and the other with a female driver aged 42 and her two children, to collide. This cost hundreds of pounds in damage for the male driver, who escaped with minor injuries, and the death of one of the woman's children. The whole event was an unnecessary disaster.

Why cant stevie wonder see? He is blind

Mr. Burns sex scandal.

Knock knock who is there ? i'm an orphaned, sir can you tell me why did you write who "is" instead of who's ?? because than i will have to use the (') key and its very far not to mention that i have to use the shift key do u want a pizza ? how much ? 50 cents ? get the hell out ? im not even in yet !

How many Republicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I would think one would be sufficient, though political affiliation shouldn't have anything to do with the situation. Unless the lightbulb was residing in a specified meeting place for members of the Republican party. Also, if the building was a more public institution for gatherings, which could imply larger ceilings, then two might be needed, just for safety precautions.

Hey i just met you and this is crazy i suck at rhyming door knob

Why aren't jokes funny in base 8? Because 7, 10, 11.

What's 5+7? Piccillo

A woman gets in her car to drive.

whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff

How do you make a dog drink? You put the dog in a blender

A mushroom walks into a crowded bar, the bartender says "we don't serve your kind here." Protestingly, the mushroom replies, "why not? I am a spore reproducing eukaryote!" Everyone stares as an awkward silence ensues.

What do you call a Mexican named Chicee? Chicee

A man walks in a bar. He walks out.

How did the guy in a wheelchair get up 7 flights of stairs? He didn't.

Whats long and hard on a black man..... 2nd grade

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupting doctor. Interrupting doct- You have cancer.

What do a a pickle and a rabbit have in common? They are both green...except the rabbit

Last week, I saw a film. As I recall it was a horror film.

Jack and Jill climbed up the hill .... and fetched a pail of water.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it lacks the cognitive reasoning ability necessary to determine that walking into oncoming traffic will surely result in death

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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