whats orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot

What time is it? Actually, that sentence is grammatically wrong: what is IT?

Roses are red violets are blue this poem make no sense microwave.

What do you call a man with no arms or legs after he got into a fight with his cat? You call him by his name and apologize for leaving catnip on his head.

Hickory Dickory Dock mother is a whore

josh roberts you speccy cuunt

Knock Knock Who is it? Me, I forgot my keys on the way out oh ok...

what did one mexican say to the other Hi.

Why did the basketball player shoot the ball? Because it was being mean to him

A guy walks into a bar. He puts an icepack on his head so it doesn't swell, and decides to go out for a drink. He walks into a bar and thinks to himself, "that's twice today, maybe I should just go home."

Oh. So his name's Brandon.

Why did a monkey fall out of a tree? He was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of a tree? Gravity. Why did the third monkey fall out of a tree? He was stapled to the second monkey.

whats worse than fining 7 dead babies in 1 trash can? finding 1 dead baby in 7 trashcans!

Why do white people wear black shirts? Why do black people wear white shirts?

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because its coop was on fire.

Who taught Chuck Norris? -Chuck Norris

What do you call a Mexican with a Green Card? A hard working American Citizen

Q:Why did the man rob the bank? A:He needed money.... duhhh -Ryan Vallee

A man is walking down the street and sees a women sat on the pavement crying, he walks over to her and asks "what's wrong?" to which the women replies "it doesn't matter" the women then walks away as she did not want to share personal information with a stranger.

My friends are like trampolines I have none

What do you get when you cross corn with more corn? A devestating force that will make you live on a rowboat and perform demeaning puppet shows you will not Even enyoy!!!!

What's worst then the holocaust, titanit and 9-11 4 bee stings.

Whats worse than finding a jew in your bed. Jake skellern

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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