Knock Knock... Who's there... .....................

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friend: whats in the box? me: shhhh, its your mom... im saving her for later.

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a blond applies to college she gets in because she did well in highschool

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Two muffins are in an oven. It was a really small batch.

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Why Sam Vitale gay? Because he loves men!

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What did the fox say to the blonde? "Hello". The girl then captured the fox and sold it to the government.

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john liked the paper........ so he took it

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What is worse

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Polly went out for a cigarette. Then she was raped.

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girls are a lot like trees, they fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

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Mommy, where do babies come from? In biology, sex is a process of combining and mixing genetic traits, often resulting in the specialization of organisms into a male or female variety (each known as a sex). Sexual reproduction involves combining specialized cells (gametes) to form offspring that inherit traits from both parents. Gametes can be identical in form and function (known as isogametes), but in many cases an asymmetry has evolved such that two sex-specific types of gametes (heterogametes) exist: male gametes are small, motile, and optimized to transport their genetic information over a distance, while female gametes are large, non-motile and contain the nutrients necessary for the early development of the young organism. An organism's sex is defined by the gametes it produces: males produce male gametes (spermatozoa, or sperm) while females produce female gametes (ova, or egg cells); individual organisms which produce both male and female gametes are termed hermaphroditic. Frequently, physical differences are associated with the different sexes of an organism; these sexual dimorphisms can reflect the different reproductive pressures the sexes experience. Thanks mommy

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what r the two best ways to describe a guy whose eating a bannana while peeing, time conservative and a multitasker

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A black guy moves in to your neighborhood. The housing values plummet due to the current economic recession.

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What did the man say to the homeless child. Where's you parents?

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Whats worse than a bee sting? - Two bee stings Whats worse than two bee stings? -The Holocaust Whats worse than the Holocaust? -Three bee stings

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A man walks into a bar. Now, that's unheard of !

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Your mama's so stupid she brought syrup to the quidditch world cup because she heard there would be quaffles!

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what's worse then being dumped? NOTHING

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A businessman notices an attractive woman sitting at the end of the bar so he buys her a drink. She kindly accepts and spends a few minutes making pleasant conversation with him. When she's finished with her drink, she promptly begins to flirt with another man at the bar who's not twenty years older than her and horribly out of shape. The middle-aged businessman, realizing his own mortality, proceeds to spend the rest of the evening drinking himself into vortex of loneliness.

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what do you call a guy with a huge dick ? hugedickasorus

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What was the beauty pageant contestant with a bladder control problem told by the judges? You’re an 8.

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How do Chinese people name their kids? The couple discuss possible names and then pick the one that they feel suits the child best.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue I'm Schizophrenic and so am I

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Two Jews are on their way to the giant oven, one looks back at the other in fear and says, "I think I overcooked the lasagna."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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