How many wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None. They prefer digging burrows for hibernation.

The only silverware Frank Lampard will be lifting this year is his mums urn.

Why didn't the boy run the marathon? He was cripple.

Some people are like Slinkies: they get really boring after a while.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?? Where's my tractor?

What happened to the guy who ate an alarm clock at six o' clock in the morning? He puked a lot, and was diagnosed with a horrible digestive disorder.

What is brown and sticky? Poop

What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

Two Haitians walk into a bar and it collapses

A fat boy walked into a party

What did the bus driver say to the black man? I like your shoes.

why did the boys voice get so deep? He just went through puberty

A boy was constantly getting bullyed at school... so he went home

Knock Knock. Whose there? Not your dead mom.

what do you get when you cross a pig with a bunny? Nothing.Crossing a pig with a bunny is impossible.

Happiness is just at the end of the road... Just take a look at how long that road is yeah i wouldnt even try

How do you get a baby out of a blender? Call the police and have them deal with the tragedy.

How do you kill a fly? Shoot it

Today, we will be identifying power tools. This is not a drill.

Shit I forgot to put the slash. Thang god for google

What do you call a Mexican and a Black man on the moon? Astronauts.

A black guy walks into a bar with a beatiful parrot on his shoulder. "Wow," says the bartender. "That is really something. Where'd you get it?" The parrot was his fathers. Do to severe mental and physical illness, he can no longer take care of it. He asked his son to take it, those were his last words as he slipped into a coma

roses are red, violets are violet

Why did the tortoise beat the hare. The tortoise had carcinoma thyroid cancer in the renal pelvis uterur.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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