It's your mother, open the door.

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Oprah is black and the richest women in the world!!!

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I cat tried to jump over a fence It was electrified

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Q; Why was the man loosing his hair? A; Because since he was at an older age, he was going bald.

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Why was the little girl lying on the floor. Because she got shot.

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Q: What came first, the chicken or the egg? A: The egg, dinosaurs reproduced long before chickens existed.

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dear GIRLS, roses are red violets are blue faces like yours belong in the zoo don't be mad i will be there too not in the cage but laughing at u .

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Hey, do you want to play the r.a.p.e game ? NO! That's the spirit

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Who taught Chuck Norris? -Chuck Norris

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Today i told myself i would write a joke... Joke... ????????????LAUGH!????????????

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because it had no arms. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it had no legs. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Because its not suppost to be in the tree. Why did susy fall off her bike? Because she was hit by 2 monkeys and a refrigerator!

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What did the poor guy get for christmas? The homeless guy.

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The President, the Pope, and a small child are in a plane when the pilot announces that they are about to crash. The plane hits the ocean. They quickly remember that there is a life jacket under their seats and they promptly put it on, but wait to inflate it (by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs) it until after exiting the cabin.

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How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask them politely to turn down their volume.

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A guy is taking a pee in the ocean and a fish swims up and drinks the pee. The fish says "thanks for the lemonade."

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"Hell nahhh I called shotgun" -Rosa Parks

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A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

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Ah dead on it was all Taggart!!!

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Why is Joel so gay and skinny? He was raised by goats with eating disorders.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I threw a fridge at it

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Someone else's cheese.

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What do you get when you cross corn with more corn? A devestating force that will make you live on a rowboat and perform demeaning puppet shows you will not Even enyoy!!!!

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Jim fell of his bike, wanna know how. Someone threw a car at him. Knock knock, who's there, not Jim

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How do you know if it's to late to turn your homework in? When the time allotted is up.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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