A businessman notices an attractive woman sitting at the end of the bar so he buys her a drink. She kindly accepts and spends a few minutes making pleasant conversation with him. When she's finished with her drink, she promptly begins to flirt with another man at the bar who's not twenty years older than her and horribly out of shape. The middle-aged businessman, realizing his own mortality, proceeds to spend the rest of the evening drinking himself into vortex of loneliness.

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Why couldn't sally drive her car? Because sally is a girl.

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What do u call a gay guy with a long dik Dickgimme a lick

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A terrorist walks into a bar and shoots his virgin

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Yo moma is so fat. yep.

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what do you call a shoe with legs? roadrunners.

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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Chuck Norris doesn't sleep. He has been diagnosed with chronic insomnia.

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Q: what is man without a beard A:not a man

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T-Dog scare me

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Why did Harry go to the store? He was out of food.

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What's green and has wheels? A chinese race car driver.

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What's up? A direction...

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What do you call a horse with wings? Nonexistant. Welcome to the real world kid.

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What is red, and bucket shaped? A red bucket.

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Why was the little boy sad? Because a stranger stole his shirt.

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A man walks into a bar and says, "Ouch!" The other bar patrons ask him what is wrong, to which he replies, "I stubbed my toe."

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Wanna hear a funny story? Sure. Ok.

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a dog walks into a drug store and orders a bone. what does the cashier do? she wakes up.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? A Jehovah Witness.

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- Mother, where's my bread? - It's in the living room.

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2 Jews walk into a bar. They have a couple drinks and call a cab to get home

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What was the beauty pageant contestant with a bladder control problem told by the judges? You’re an 8.

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Yo momma so thin, she admitted herself into an in-patient counseling center for anorexic and bulimic patients.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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