Why did the lady spill her coffee? The waiter accidently ran into her and then apologized.

WTF BOOOOOM

Immediately following his inauguration, Bush called Obama into the oval office for a private meeting and some words of advice. Bush and Obama shook hands as gentlemen do and then Bush asked if Obama wanted to hear a joke. Obama eagerly said yes, "Good..." Bush said, handing Obama a battered copy of the United States Constitution, "...the joke is in your hands", and with that Bush turned and left.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the ocean? SOL.

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names.

If anybody wants a free RuneScape account, the username is Antbongton and the password is fluckaduck

What do you cal a black boy with a bike? A thief

Why did the math teacher cry during 6th period? He was held at gunpoint.

"Knock, Knock" "Go away, I have a lot of stuff to do right now and knock knock jokes suck."

What's white and very boney? A bone

I used to think I was indecisive, but now I am not so sure.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house knock knock who's there? the chicken

In Soviet Russia, you shit on bird.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens do not possess the mental capacity to grasp the idea of "roads"

What do you call a puppy with no eyes? Ugly,

The lemons on the tree are ripe. They will be picked.

You say you can read me like a book, well the jokes on you. I am not a book.

What do airplanes and grapes have in common? They both have wings, except a grape doesn't.

A penguin was waddling along one day and saw a seal.. The seal stood up and procceded to talk and jump and even twirled around... The penguin realized this was impossible for a seal to be doing this so he hopped on his unicycle and just rode home because he was going to be late for his piano recital

a muslim, jew, and catholic went into a bar and sat down and had drinks. The muslim asks the jew "are you macrobiotic". the jew replies "no" and they go about their fun....

Two gay guys go into a bedroom, in different houses at different times.

Did you hear that joke about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

What did the cab driver say to the duck who wanted a ride in the cab? Get out of the cab.

What is worse than being ran over by a bus? Nothing really.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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