How big is Justin Bieber's penis? 10 inches, and its in his ass, and its actually Usher's penis

Why couldn't the boy play catch with his dad? His Dad is dead.

there are 4 men in a bar talking about how well their sons are doing with their lives. But one man goes to the toilet. So the first man says 'my son is doing really well he is the head of a airline company and for christmas he got his bestfriend a plane.' The second man says' My son is doing really well he has his own car brand and for christmas he got his bestfriend a brand new car.' The third man says' Well my son is doing really well, He owns his own housing estate business and for christmas he bought his best friend a 250'000 sq foot mansion. The fourth man comes out of the toilet and all the three men say ' We are talking about how our sons are doing in their lives so what about yours.' The fourth man goes' well my son is gay but its not that bad because for christmas his three boyfriends got him a new plane, a new car and a 250'000 sq foot mansion.'

Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A blonde is a Homo sapien (Latin for knowing man), a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans . A mosquito on the other hand is a common insect in the family Culicidae (from the Latin culex meaning midge or gnat).

Q: Where do you find a dog with no legs? A: Probably right where you left him, since animals with no appendages have no way of mobility

Q: Whats more fun that nailing babys to a fence? A: Ripping them off.

World Peace

Your mother is so fat that her doctor recommended that she exercise regularly and eat foods with nutritional value.

There are two fish in a bathtub. One turns to the other and says "Could you please pass the soap?" The other one says "What do I look like to you, a typewriter?"

Roses are bright, Violets are sad, I like sprite I'm really struggling for ideas at this point

What do you get when an Asian and a black person have a baby? Black and yellow. Black and yellow. Black and yellow. :)

What's brown and sticky? Poo

whats the best way to burn calories? Set a fat kid on fire.

Q.What's worse than running over a dog on the road? A.9/11

Looks through the peephole.

whats worse than your brother dying in a car accident? finding out the rest of your family was in there

Whats worse than 1 dead baby in a bag? Ten dead babies in one bag.

What do you do when a blonde throws a hand grenade at you? Run.

Wikipedia has no entry on "gullibility."

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because i was keeping his family at gun-point on the other side.

Why do Jews circumcise their children.......because they like everything 10% off

Why did a lady get in a car crash? Because woman don't drive, they stay in the kitchen!

How many blonds does it take to kidnap a child? One.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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