Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is dead.

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A man eats a piece of fried chicken A chicken that was days before retirement and had a pregnant wife and two children to look after

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Why is the world round? The early earth was molten, and a liquid in a vacuum subject only to its own gravitational forces will assume the shape of a sphere. Gases will behave in the same manner. The effects of the sun and other planets, plus the rotational effect have caused the earth to assume a round shape.

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What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

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how do make a condom fly around the room? Piss it off!

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My Girlfriend

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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The funniest tragedy in his young life...wasn't funny.

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Looking for a job in this economy is like trying to find employment during an extreme economic downturn.

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What's up? The sky.

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Why don't Mexicans sneak back across the border? Because there are more opportunities and free stuff here. Why would they want to leave, especially at the risk of getting caught for crossing in a sneaky fashion?

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Why didn't Jane buy an ice-cream? Because she was lactose intolerant.

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Q: What is so funny about a dog chasing his tail? A: The dog cannot figue out that it his own tail, and every time he moves so does the tail. Therefore never reaching a satisfying end for the mentaly chalanged mutt.

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Q: Why did the plane crash into a mountain? A: The pilot was a tomato.

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Q: How do you fit 20 babies into a bowl? A: A blender. Q: How do you get them out? A: Tortilla chips.

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Q. Why did the man fall off his bike? A. He was hit by a canoe.

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I once ate at a restaurant where the food was so bad that the chef's name was Earl.

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I was on Skype with a girl yesterday and she asked "Do you want to see something?" "No," I said "my mom's in the room and she might get a bad interpretation." "I really want you to see this." She said. " No, my mom's still in the room, she'll think I'm weird if you turn out the lights." "Darn I really wanted to see your glow in the dark snuggie."

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Four homosexuals walk into a bar and theres only one bar stool left how do they all sit down on that one bar stool. They flip the bar stool around and sit down all together

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Your Momma is so ugly, she got plastic surgery.

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A young girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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brett is a dick

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What is brown and sticky? The substance used to line your stomach when getting your stomach pumped.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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