Your mother is so fat that when she passes in front of the tv, I lose 3 seasons of the series

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What's the difference between black people and dog shit? One of them eventually turns white and stops smelling.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue you have hemroids

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Cancer.

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Robocop and T-800 where fighting, first the T-800 manages to injure Robocop critically, but Robocop manages to repair himself and break T-800`s legs off, which T-800 suddenly regrows due to an unexpected upgrade. After several hours of combat, where civilians are injured and half the town is destroyed they where both worn out, but ready for one last struggle... ...Eventually there was a great celebration for whoever won.

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Today i told myself i would write a joke... Joke... ????????????LAUGH!????????????

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whats really hot the sun

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Will my son live, doctor? No because you don't have a son and I am not a doctor

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your mom is so poor that she is unable to pay for your child care leaving you to have a terrible childhood, troubled adolescence, and eventually lie passed out in an alley after OD'ing off of heroin.

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How many women does it take to change a lightbulb? None, let the bitch cook in the dark.

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Why does the jailbird sing? It makes Bubba horny.

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How do you keep an extraordinary magician from performing his show? Replace his shampoo with battery acid

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What do you call a horse and a donkey mixed together? A mule.

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Did you know?

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What has two feet and cant walk? a cripple

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Dude? What. Dude? What! Wheres my car?

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What do you get when you mix a fox and a sloth? a..FOTH

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Norm Macdonald's roast of Bob Saget.

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"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "I already asked ''Banana who?'' Is that your real name? Who is this really?" "Knock Knock." "You are upsetting me. I am calling the police now. Please get off my property."

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Amy Winehouse has been sober for 2 weeks now.

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What is the difference between a black guy and shit? One just looks and smells like shit, and the other actually is shit.

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What happened when the roof fell on a young boy? Nothing. He was an orphan.

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Why didn't the bear go snowboarding? It was hibernating

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Q: How do you fit 20 babies into a bowl? A: A blender. Q: How do you get them out? A: Tortilla chips.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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