What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

Roses are red Violets are blue This difference is due largely to the alteration of the white light wavelenght as it excites the electrons in both flowers and the absorption of most of the other colours of the spectrum.

Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: Your mother sucks.

A. Why did the chicken cross the road? B. To get to the other side.

What did the African boy get for Christmas? Nothing because he celebrates Kwanza.

A woman goes to the doctor.....She has terminal cancer.

Why do black people eat at KFC? Because KFC serves good food at reasonable prices.

How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb in WW2. None, the Nazis toke away the power and left them to die a Horrible and painful death.

Swiggity Swooty. I'm currently in pursuit for that part of your body people refer to as "booty".

why did the parakeet eat the cracker? because it wanted to.

A man orders 3,687 bricks. He gets 3,688 bricks delivered to him. He throws the extra brick in the air. Ok, so a man is smoking a cigar by a woman with a small poodle. They are both in a plane. The woman asks the man if he could get rid of the cigar because the smoke is making her dog turn green. The man refuses. In anger, she throws the cigar out of the window. The man gets angry and throws the poodle out the window. What lands in the poodles mouth when it's falling? The brick.

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because chickens can move and the road just happened to be in its path.

Here's the senario, There are 2 astronauts kayaking in the Sahara dessert. the question is how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? The awnser is purple because ice cream has no bones.

the guy below me is gay

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

What is the biggest, most elaborate lie? Santa Clause

What did the anti-social man say to a girl Nothing

Why was Jim gay? Because he liked penis.

Timmy heard that Red Bull gives you wings. He drank one and waited. No wings. He drank another and waited. No wings. Timmy drank 3 cases of Red Bull trying to get wings. Timmy died. The end.

Why did the leprechian meleste Justin Bieber? ..... He stole his lucky charms.

Why Can't Asian women drive? a: Cause they are chink assholes who have only peripheral vision

Knock Knock. Come in.

If a dyslexic man walks into a bar, check your notes. You told the joke wrong.

A: Knock knock. B: <>

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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