How do you keep a blonde occupied for hours? Put on an entertaining movie.

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AHHHHHHH OMGOMG OMG I SAY TO MY MUM SHE RUNS INTO THE ROOM SCREEMING AND SAYS WHAT HAPPEND I SAY ....................... i forgot now (k.c)

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Why did the Nazi not help the black man up after he had been badly injured? The Nazi was in a wheelchair.

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Why did the tree fall down? Because no one caught it.

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Chuck Norris doesn't sleep. He has been diagnosed with chronic insomnia.

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What's the difference between a zebra and a newspaper? Everything.

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hey i just meet you and this is crazy but i picked out our wedding cake and named our 4 future children :-)))))))

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

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What's green and has wheels? A chinese race car driver.

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This is not a good joke.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? genocide whats worse than genocide? getting raped by a giant scorpion

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What's blue and smells like yellow paint? Blue paint.

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There are two muffins sitting in an oven the first muffin turns to the other and says "Its pretty hot in here." the second muffin jumps back and yells "HOLY SHIT A TALKING MUFFIN!!!"

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Yo mama's so ugly that the majority of people find her physically unattractive, but I hear her personality if great.

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Why is One direction the best thing in the world? Becuz when 5 hot guys met each other they... Sorry I got lost in Zayn's eyes again! Now what were we talking about??????

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Lebron Traveled

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This is my joke. funny

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Yo mama's so stupid, she put the baby in the microwave

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Did you know, that every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute passes?

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? A Jehovah Witness.

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Whats Black and hangs from a tree? A Tire(:

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What do you call a special Ed walrus? Anorexic pony ???? Discovering that a convicted sex offenderi is living nearby stirs up a range of feelings: fear, anger, insecurity and anxiety. There are many things you can do to make the situation more manageable - and channel these emotions into actions that address situations that put children most at risk for sexual harm. Learn how to identify the most common threats and concerns. Then find out the best ways you can join with others to keep everyone safe. Take action! Learn how to keep children safe Get the FAQs about the sex offender registryi Download our Tip Sheet:  Concerned about Sex Offenders in Your Neighborhood?

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? A: Drowning.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops