why did the man cross the road? Because he needed to cross the road to reach his destination that was across the road

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Why did the lady spill her coffee? The waiter accidently ran into her and then apologized.

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what do lions and potatoes have in common? They each drive a sports car, wait neither the lion nor the potato drive a sports car. Sorry to waste your time with this joke that seemed to not really have a meaning or a clever punchline.

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What do you cal a black boy with a bike? A thief

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What do you call a lady that cleans? A cleaning lady.

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What do you get when you cross a chicken with a beagle? An abomination.

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Whats purple and fluffy? Purple Fluff

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Why did bob die Cause he got hit by a mailbox

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How do you kill a blue elephant? How? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? How? You hold it's nose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a orange elephant? How? You can't, they don't exist. How do you kill a white elephant? How? You tickle it till it turns pink, then you hold it's noose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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Two guys walk into a bar... They sat down, had a few drinks and left without any incident.

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Did you hear that Hellen Keller went driving? Now she's also paralyzed.

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Knock knock Who's there? The police, we know you've been pirating movies.

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Why did the rabbit like to wear shoes? It doesn't.

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What's better than getting to sleep in? Sex for the very first time.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she was born with the disorders of being blind and deaf. For any human, having blindness and deafness makes driving a near impossible task.

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Why did the little girl selling lemon aid die? Someone drove by and threw a fridge at her

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A blonde's house is on fire so she calls the fire department and they ask her how to get there. She gives them the address, but they hear her wrong and she dies a horrible fiery death.

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Two muffins are in an oven, when one muffin says to the other "its hot in here." The other muffin then says, "whoa! a talking muffin!"

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Paul Dylan King!

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs sitting on your couch? My brother.

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What did the one man say to the other? Nothing, they didn't know eachother

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What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

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a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

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whats stupid and likes dumb jokes? you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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