Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

Why did the basketball player shoot the ball? Because it was being mean to him

What do you call a muslim? A terrorist

Why did a monkey fall out of a tree? He was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of a tree? Gravity. Why did the third monkey fall out of a tree? He was stapled to the second monkey.

What goes gurgle, gurgle, gurgle, POP! A baby in a microwave.

roses are red, violets are blue, hey reed and steven, we should hang out

Why do black men run faster then white men? Because they practice more and some simply want to improve themselves in the sport more then other men. Of course, some white men are faster then some black men, so the whole question in general is not true. You should not believe everything you read on here.

What do you call a dead blonde in a closet? A rape victim.

Why did the chicken attempt to cross the road? To retrieve his dead relatives in the middle of the street.

Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupting doctor. Interrupting doct- You have cancer.

How are you supposed to breath with no air? um jorden sparks you dont?

There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

A guy walks into a bar. The bartneder says, "Wow, buddy, you look awful. What's wrong?" The guy responds, "My life is a joke."

How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask them politely to turn down their volume.

That maternal figure of yours is of such inadequate intelligence that she cannot fathom that, given a scatterplot with a linear correlation of greater than -1 and lesser than 1 and a reasonably consistent rise over run, a future value along the y-axis can be predicted if following the y=a(x)+b equation.

why couldnt sally help timmy pick up his ice cream? she had no arms

How do you punish Helen Keller? Set a restriction on something she enjoys that is equal to the degree of her misbehavior.

BOOBIES!!!!!!!

What is the most common cause of pedophilia? Sexy kids.

Cassie Mills you are gay stop being silly in class you're not funny.

A: Knock knock! A: Who's there? A: Forever A: Forever who? A: Forever Alone

Okay chan, you can have it then, I am tired.

Q; Why was the man loosing his hair? A; Because since he was at an older age, he was going bald.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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