The President, the Pope, and a small child are in a plane when the pilot announces that they are about to crash. The plane hits the ocean. They quickly remember that there is a life jacket under their seats and they promptly put it on, but wait to inflate it (by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs) it until after exiting the cabin.

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What's worse than a giant paint bubble? TWO GIANT PAINT BUBBLES!

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what's white on top and black on the bottom? Society

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A seal walks into a club.

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Where did Jimmy go after the bombing? Everywhere.

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Why did the dyslexic man walk into the bra, he didn't he walked into a bar.

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Why was Ray Charles always smiling? because he was a happy guy

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Why was six afraid of seven? It wasn't. Numbers have no feelings.

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Q:What did the cat say to the dog? A: Meow

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What do you call a muslim behind the controls of an airliner? A pilot you rascist.

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I saw a man with a hungry look in his eye, like the kind you get from not eating for a while

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Due the limited cognitive ability and a lack of critical thinking skills, the chicken mistakenly ventured across the road in search of grain. Luckily the chicken was not injured on this occasion, however other chickens may not be so lucky in the future.

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The President, a terrorist, a student, and a genius were on a crashing plane. They all died.

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Knock, Knock... Who's there An abandoned baby

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How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit him in the face with an axe.

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Knock, knock. Come in.......

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What did the man tell his parents after having sex with another man? A. I am gay.

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How do you stop a skunk from smelling? Block its nose.

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You know what I hate long anti-jokes that take up too much space.

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Its simple, if people do not have the willpower to follow their own desires, their own wishes, they do not deserve to. I have no desire to resurrect what is doomed to fail again and again, that is idealism, of course we would all have liked our own little society where people are encouraged to accept who they are and respect their own kin, regardless of race, culture and so on. But we did our best, we gave our teen years, and what did we end up with? If you think I have given up, you are right, I will help you do your thing however, but I will not stand beside you when the tide turns, had I joined you, we would all have been killed or imprisoned at best, all while "The Wizard" would have gone free maybe even with money and a medal.

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Why'd The Chicken Cross The Road? He Crossed The Road To Stand In An Icecream Line , Where A Little Boy Stood Infront Of Him, The Chicken Was Scared To Cross The Road Again To Get To The Other Side Because He Saw The Little Boy Get Hit By A Bus. So The Chicken Decided The Best Thing To Do Was To Sit Under A Tree , Where A Big White Thing Fell On Him , It Was A Fridge, Once The Fridge Hit The Ground Mexicans Ran Out And Then Explained To There Local Chickens What Crossing The Street Can Cause Them. To Be Dead. Moral: Dont Let A Chicken Cross The Road. :)

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"luke Bastiaan" "So, whens your period?"

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Why did the man have no head? He did it was under his shirt

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Q: Who won the fight of two black guys and a white guy? A: The black and white guy because two is better than one.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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