So a baby seal walks into a club

When life gives you lemons...you probably just found lemons.

Where did Lucy go went the bomb went off? Everywhere

A baby seal walks into a club...

obama is a good president

Whats worse than your camera not working? getting hit by a fridge during the Holocaust

Knock, knock. Who's there? FBI. The female body inspectors? No, the female bawdy inspectors.

A Black a Jew and a Pollack walk in to the bar bartender says "how may i help you gentlemen"

The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money issues and how she wanted a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man: "Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor: "You have aids"

How do magnets work?

SAD STORY: Boy: Make me a sandwich. Girl: No.

Why did the man not get home to his loving family? He blew up.

how do you spell ugly ? U G L Y.

slow down! you move too fast. you gotta make the morning last. just tripping down the cobblestones. looking for fun and feeling grovvy.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The holocaust.

Why was Sally a bad driver? Because she rarely signals and never checked her blind spots.

How do racist jokes start? Generally with a racially insensitive stereotype.

Why did the Jew ask for a napkin? something funny about the holocaust

Why did the man throw the clock out the window? The man's loving family had recently been murdered, and the clock was a constant reminder of their mortality, as it had served as the center of those horrific events.

A simple country boy and a hugely attractive young blonde sit in the same train carriage. They exchange greetings and pleasentaries, but are quiet for the remainder of the journey.

Knock, knock. Come in!

penis

Yo Momma is so ugly she probably doesn't have any friends.

your moms so fat when she sat on your ipod it turned into an ipad

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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