A tree walks into a bar. But it is a dead tree so it actually didn't

when the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that's a black eye.

no u

balls in ya mouf

theres safety in numbers? tell that to 6 million jews

What is the most effective abstinence plan? There is none.

I don't often drink beer. But when I do, I recklessly beat my wife and kids.

What is 69? A two digit number.

Knock Knock Who's there? The police, your wife just died

Q. How did Kit Kat candy bars get their name? A. It was chosen by manufacturer.

OH NO, ZOMBIES!!!!!!!!!!

what happens when a Texan see's a black guy? he says howdy

Q: What's the similarity between puzzles and women? A: Prior to the 1920's neither had the right to vote.

The only silverware Frank Lampard will be lifting this year is his mums urn.

Two men sit down at a bar. First man: I hear you're having a baby! Second man: My wife had a miscarriage. First man: Oh.... The talking ceased

Why aren't jokes funny in base 8? Because 7, 10, 11.

Why cant penguins fly? because they cant

Why did the Octopus jump off the bridge? To breathe

What did the boy with Aids pray for? A gun

A baby seal walks into a club...

A woman goes into a butchers with her baby. She says "I live a few doors down and my scales are broken, do you mind weighing my son?" The butcher takes the boy away and a short while later returns holding a dripping bag. "He's 17lbs two ounces" he informs her, as his colleague brings the boy to the counter safe and well.

Pickles

where do the women go? the womanarium

What do you get when you cross corn with more corn? A devestating force that will make you live on a rowboat and perform demeaning puppet shows you will not Even enyoy!!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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