What is black, white, and red all over? A domino dipped in kitten blood.

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what is more annoying than finding a worm in your apple? An asian kid with ADHD.

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What do you tell someone who says they are contemplating suicide, Get over it

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What's retarded and comes from Eygelshoven? Roel van den Elzen

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What do you call an angry black man? Angry.

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why did the man cross the road? Because he needed to cross the road to reach his destination that was across the road

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If anybody wants a free RuneScape account, the username is Antbongton and the password is fluckaduck

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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Fuck yourself you piece of shit.

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why was the boy crying? ... because he had a frog stapled yo his face.

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Why is there so much hate in the world? Because you touch yourself at night.

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I'm taken

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Knock knock? Who's there? The WNBA. LOL

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What's big and purple? Something that's big and purple

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Why did the child with terminal cancer and leprosy get sent to the principal's office? Because his parents and brother died in a car accident, and the principal though he should be informed.

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GLaDOS: So... this cat loves lasagna so much that he eats all of the lasagna in his house. Okay, apparently it's not the cat's house or his lasagna. Oh good! The man who owns the lasagna is furious! GLaDOS: The end. GLaDOS: The end? GLaDOS: That's not funny. GLaDOS: Do either of you feel like laughing? GLaDOS: Alright, I'm pulling you out. GLaDOS: Welcome back. While you were dead, I reworked the cartoon. It's up on the screen. GLaDOS: As you can see, in my version the man points out to the cat that the house is equipped with deadly neurotoxin dispensers. GLaDOS: At which point the cat reflects on the time he ate all of the man's lasagna and feels remorse. GLaDOS: Briefly. GLaDOS: Reactions? GLaDOS: Yes, it's funny because most of it actually happened.

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Why did the little girl selling lemon aid die? Someone drove by and threw a fridge at her

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My aunt used to say slow and steady wins the race she died in a fire

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Roses are gray Violets are gray I am a dog

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A sick patient asks a doctor, "will i be able to play my guitar?" The doctor replies, "of course you will be able to". "Good because that is my only form of income", says the patient.

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2 black guys and a Mexican are in the backseat of a car. Who's driving. The cops

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Women's rights.

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There once was a beautiful princess named Snow White who lived with seven dwarves in the forest. One day, and old hag approached her and offered her an apple. She bit into the apple, chewed, and said,"Wow, that's tasty. Is this a Golden Delicious?" The hag said, "Why yes, it is. I have a private orchard. Perhaps I'll let you see it some time." The two promptly resumed their lives.

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Two gay guys go into a bedroom, in different houses at different times.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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