- Anti Joke

Trust me im a doctor but this is pratice

Doctor! Doctor! Can I have a second opinion? The Doctor then sits the patient down and tells them from a different perspective that they have terminal Cancer and will be dead by the end of the year.

What happened to Jim. He died his funeral is tomorrow.

How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit it in the face with an axe

Dont be silly, you know that everything is relative, and that relativity is as unlimited as the subconscious mind, give me ten more minutes, and I can hypnotize you in five minutes in order to see life in slow motion yourself for as long as you feel like. Just dont expect your body to adjust like mine, meaning that if you try to run, your brain will use its old habits while your perception is used to the slow ones... In other words, you will end up on the floor or smacking into a wall.

If life gives you melons, you might be dyslexic

what's worse then droping your phone. 9/11 having sex with the holocaust

A grasshopper walks into into a bar and the bartender says, "We have a drink named after you. But me telling you this is in no way productive because insects cannot understand human language."

There was an old man from Limerick. He was of scottish ancestry and nearing his 76th birthday.

How many jews died in a gas chamber? None because the holocaust is a myth.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The holocaust.

Not at all, I find your perception of things like that quite pleasing, you obviously care about me, and care about your wife, that's nice.

What's meaty and has a poof? A meatball with a bubble.

How long does it take for a Jew to die being gased. Same as anyone else.

A blonde, the pope, and a young kid are in a crashing airplane and there's only one parachute. But by the time any of them equips it, the plane hits the ground and they all die.

A duck walks into a bar, the bartender asks "What'd you want?" the duck responds "A miller lite please" promptly after that the bartender was tested for mental insanity because he thinks ducks can talk.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Trust me im a doctor but this is pratice

Doctor! Doctor! Can I have a second opinion? The Doctor then sits the patient down and tells them from a different perspective that they have terminal Cancer and will be dead by the end of the year.

What happened to Jim. He died his funeral is tomorrow.

How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit it in the face with an axe

If life gives you melons, you might be dyslexic

Homework.

what's worse then droping your phone. 9/11 having sex with the holocaust

A grasshopper walks into into a bar and the bartender says, "We have a drink named after you. But me telling you this is in no way productive because insects cannot understand human language."

There was an old man from Limerick. He was of scottish ancestry and nearing his 76th birthday.

How many jews died in a gas chamber? None because the holocaust is a myth.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The holocaust.

Not at all, I find your perception of things like that quite pleasing, you obviously care about me, and care about your wife, that's nice.

What's meaty and has a poof? A meatball with a bubble.

How long does it take for a Jew to die being gased. Same as anyone else.

A blonde, the pope, and a young kid are in a crashing airplane and there's only one parachute. But by the time any of them equips it, the plane hits the ground and they all die.

A duck walks into a bar, the bartender asks "What'd you want?" the duck responds "A miller lite please" promptly after that the bartender was tested for mental insanity because he thinks ducks can talk.

Her lips are not proportionally fit to her face.

Flab

What did the farmer say when he lost his pig? Wheres my Pig?

Who's the cutest girl in the world? Claire Seiter.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

What is worse than hell?

what to you call a black person that flies planes? a pilot YOU RACIST

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??