Why did the man drop his glasses? His hand was sweaty.

Q: What's the point? A: .

Why did Timmy stop running? He got hit by a bus

two muffins are in an oven one muffin says man its pretty hot in here and the other muffin says oh my god a talking muffin

There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

Q: What did the anorexic girl do for thanksgiving? A: Nothing, she was paralyzed from a fall 2 days prior and nobody had found her yet.

Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupting doctor. Interrupting doct- You have cancer.

Oh. So his name's Brandon.

Q: Who won the fight of two black guys and a white guy? A: The black and white guy because two is better than one.

how do you wake up lady gaga? scream in her ear.

Its simple, if people do not have the willpower to follow their own desires, their own wishes, they do not deserve to. I have no desire to resurrect what is doomed to fail again and again, that is idealism, of course we would all have liked our own little society where people are encouraged to accept who they are and respect their own kin, regardless of race, culture and so on. But we did our best, we gave our teen years, and what did we end up with? If you think I have given up, you are right, I will help you do your thing however, but I will not stand beside you when the tide turns, had I joined you, we would all have been killed or imprisoned at best, all while "The Wizard" would have gone free maybe even with money and a medal.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind.

what do you get when you cross a pig with a bunny? Nothing.Crossing a pig with a bunny is impossible.

What did the poor guy get for christmas? The homeless guy.

How many women does it take to change a lightbulb? None, let the bitch cook in the dark.

Why did the little kid use pillows at night? Because he was constipated.

Whats better than the holocaust. Darfur

Why did the man have no head? He did it was under his shirt

A woman is home washing her dishes when she suddenly slips banging her head on a cabinet. She passed out for a few seconds, then woke to find a great gash on her left cheek, fairly spurting blood. At the emergency room, the doctor asks, "How did this happen?" The woman replied, "My boy friend tried to drown me."

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple, finding a apple in your worm.

What wears a white robe and shines? A special boar.

Why do white people wear black shirts? Why do black people wear white shirts?

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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