Q: What has one eye but cannot see? A: A blind cyclops

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What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handlebars except the duck.

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Guess what? What? Nothing.

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How many flies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2.

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Your mom was so stupid that she went back to school and now she is graduated with a degree.

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What's worse than 4 black guys sitting in a Jeep that goes over a cliff? They were my friends.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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What do you call a plane full of Arab guys? Something not so good.

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What happened to the boy who got everything he ever wanted? He turned into a gluttonous and greedy adult who eagerly spent all of his money and subsequently died alone.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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How many arabs can fit in a 2007 honda accord? legally up to 5

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how do you teach a baby to walk? cut of its hands.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock, Knock. Who's there? ........Chicken...?

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why was the guy crying at the bar his house got bombed

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F@ck me in the ass until I say STOP. Before we start, can you please ducktape my mouth?

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what did the kid do after the rabbit told him trix are for kids? he beat him with a stick then ate some sushi.

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Who is pack bombs and has gum cancer? • Theo Kingdom

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Why was the man tired at his soccer game? Because he did not sleep well the night before

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Q: How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: I heard this joke before but I can't remember

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OMG I NEED FRESH WATER

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Two black guys and a Latino were walking down the street. One of the black guys says to the Latino, "You have some lint on your suit." The Latino brushes it off and says, "Thank you. I have an important meeting with the board of trustees this afternoon, and it would have been embarrassing if I had lint on my suit."

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Q: What does a blond do with a box of crayons? A: Paints a picture

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Yo mama's so poor she is on welfare.

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A man walks into a park and presents candy to children. They request more candy and thus are laureded into his van. They are raped murdered and never seen again.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops