What flys? A fly

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How come Michael Jackson can draw a perfect circle? He likes little BOYS.

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What do you get when you mix red and yellow? Orange.

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Milk, milk, lemonade, around the corner fudge is made. This market has a very dynamic and fresh selection.

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A man sees the doctor. "Doctor, if I hit myself on my head, it hurts, if I hit myself on my arm, it hurts, and if I hit myself on my leg, it hurts as well." "The case is clear. You need to f*ing stop hitting yourself!"

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Why couldn't Jimmy ride his bike? His family had to sell it in order to put food on the table

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a horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?" and the horse says "my wife has terminal cancer.

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What's the difference between a bunch of slaves and a porsche? A: i don't have porsche in my basement

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What did the cow say to the other cow? How should i know? Go ask them.

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"Hello." "Hi."

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Why did the boy fall of the swing? Because he had no arms

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A hot girl walks by a boy and he stares at her as she walks past. She see's him and asks "What are you looking at?", to which the boy replied "Oh I'm sorry. You happened to look familiar and I thought 'Perhaps I've met this person before. School? No. Work? No. I then concluded I've never seen you before and then you turned around and asked me what I was looking at".

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What did Mambo say to Jumbo? Nothing. Because they weren't friends.

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How do you kill a blue elephant? How? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? How? You hold it's nose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a orange elephant? How? You can't, they don't exist. How do you kill a white elephant? How? You tickle it till it turns pink, then you hold it's noose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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Why cant Michael Jackson take flying lessons? Because he overdosed on pain killers, and is now dead.

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whats blue and fluffy? BLUE FLUFF

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what do you call a fish without eyes? a fshhhhh

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What do you get when you cross an African-American, a bird, and ice cream? I don't know.

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What do you call 4 Mexicans hopping the border? 4 Mexicans in search of a better lifestyle from poverty.

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Why is Ellen so funny? Because she is a comedian.

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What did mr. Mackey say to his class. It's easy mkay

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What do you call three black men in a car? One driver, and two passengers.

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Why was the baseball player arrested after stealing a base? Because he pulled out a knife and stabbed the shortstop in the chest.

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Two gay guys go into a bedroom, in different houses at different times.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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