Yo mama is so fat that you are constantly ridiculed by the local kids and constantly hope that the obesity isn't hereditary.

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My Girlfriend

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I cut my pubes, Now they itch a lot.

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Lamborghini mercy, yo chick she so thirsty Swerve, swerve

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How do you catch a squirrel? Use a live, humane trap, and release it back into the wild afterwards.

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what do you get if you cross a lion with a pig? nothing as the lion would more than likely end up eating the high in fat pig.

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You might be a redneck if you are from a rural area and act as such.

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I am really good at math debating

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Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? A: You can't wear cleats on a trampoline.

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YOLO

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Why didn't the 13 year old Black boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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A duck walked up to the lemonade stand and he said the the man running the stand hey ba ba ba got any grapes? the man said no but i got some shut the F*CK up!

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Knock Knock It's Open!

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A man suffering from terminal cancer walks into a bar and orders a soda because his doctor advised him not to drink. The bartender and others in the establishment are completely unaware of his disability.

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three men walked into a bar, can't believe know one noticed it.

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a dog walks into a drug store and orders a bone. what does the cashier do? she wakes up.

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what do you call a stupid chav? Gifted

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What did the prostitute say to the cop? What? I can suck your dick for free Mr. Officer

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weiner? balls

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Me: do u you want to here a joke You: ya Me: Woman's rights

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whats short and has spots? A mouse with the chicken pocks.

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money issues and how she wanted a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man: "Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor: "You have aids"

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Why are anti-jokes so funny?

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Knock, knock. Come in!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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