What do you call a black man driving a car? A driver.

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What did the homosexual say to the purse walking down the street? - I'm a homosexual.

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how do you say desk in spanish? escritorio

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A man walks into a car dealership. The salesman was nice and he bought a Mercedes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The undeveloped cerebral cortex vital for comprehending irony left the chicken incapable of finding humor or possibly feeling self-disgust in the acknowledgment that it had just wandered across said road, this being a grandfathered human jest.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a car.

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"luke Bastiaan" "So, whens your period?"

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Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died...

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Knock-Knock "Who's there?" "It's the police. We have a search warrant."

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What do you call a bus full of lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A tragedy

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Knock knock, Knock knock jokes aren't funny.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "what'll it be?" The horse, unable to understand human language. Takes a shit and walks out.

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Why did the man pee his pants? Because he was paralyzed from the waste down and had no way of feeling

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What is the most common cause of pedophilia? Sexy kids.

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Two chemists walk into a bar. The first says, "I'd like some H2O" The second says "I'd like some H2O as well." Nobody dies.

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Communism

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MICHAEL

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What do you call a women with two black eyes? Someone trapped in the cycle of violence that is domestic abuse. The few friends and family members she still speaks with tell she should leave. They don't know about the last time she threatened to leave him, when he held a gun to her throat and screamed "You try an leave me I'll kill you and your precious god damn babies!" Now she suffers silently for fear of what he might do to her family, but is increasingly worried about the way her husband has begun looking at their 13 year old daughter. Every night she kneels at the foot of her bed and prays for death, over the sounds of her own sobbing and her husbands drunken rage. Also she is a slow learner.

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a duck walks in to a Chinese restaurant and the cut his head off

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A pregnant woman is about to deliver. Both she and her husband are very excited about their first child being born. Then, it turn out that their baby has a rare deformation and has no limbs at all. They still love him

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I have alzheimers but atleast I don't have alzheimers

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I walked in on my daughter masturbating. The whole ordeal was very uncomfortable, but I sat her down at the dining table to discreetly explain the necessity of locking doors.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Guitar. Guiar who? Violin.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops