I walked in on my daughter masturbating. The whole ordeal was very uncomfortable, but I sat her down at the dining table to discreetly explain the necessity of locking doors.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Where does Frosty the Snowman keep his money? He doesn't keep it. His lifespan is too short to make significant compound intrest.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Your dad is so dumb he tried to put M&M's in abc order

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Man I'm Bored Nice to meet you.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did a monkey fall out of a tree? He was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of a tree? Gravity. Why did the third monkey fall out of a tree? He was stapled to the second monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what do a midget and a dwarf have in common? they both die by the age of 25 due to genetic failures.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the cow die? Because we need meat

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Alright, if you guess it right, I'll stop playing Mario and finish my division problems. Okay, Mom, call it in the air! Heads or Tails? Huntington's Disease is the reason your Father doesn't remember your name anymore, Billy. There's a fifty percent chance you'll end up with it too. I am so sorry. Also, Tails.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the rape victim say to the rapist? "mmfff...mmm.....mmmmm"

thumb_up thumb_down +11

I scream! You scream! - You've Just Been Rapped

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the man have no head? He did it was under his shirt

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why could the black man not fall asleep? The gunshots outside his home in Compton constantly awoke him

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Penis!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What'd the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Just Dance 2 the video game

thumb_up thumb_down +9

I have alzheimers but atleast I don't have alzheimers

thumb_up thumb_down +9

I used to be an adventurer like you. Then i took an arrow to the knee.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Roses are red, violet are blue I have AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do a grape and a reindeer have in common? They're both purple, except the reindeer.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A Jew walks into a gas chamber.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

NEVER

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did Chuck Norris go to Chuck E Cheeses? Because his friend wanted to go.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the Jew pick a dollar off the ground? He dropped it.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops