What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? 12:00

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what do you call a fish without eyes? a fshhhhh

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Why did the boy fall in the hole? He had no eyes

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Why did the child with terminal cancer and leprosy get sent to the principal's office? Because his parents and brother died in a car accident, and the principal though he should be informed.

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minorities.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What's black, white, and red all over? White on black homicide.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side... But he got hit by a car instead, Life is full of disappointments

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust.

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Why are elephants big, grey, and wrinkled? Because if they were small, white, and round they'd be called aspirin.

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what is black, white, and red all over? A bloody panda

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What do you call a Mexican baptism? A blessed occasion.

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Q: What did the black guy say when he stubbed his toe? A: Ouch.

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2 black guys and a Mexican are in the backseat of a car. Who's driving. The cops

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Leave the plunger in her toilet with the handle greased.

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A man and a women have a conversation. Man: what's 2 + 2 Woman: four. Man: you're correct.

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a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

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Kid: Teacher, what do you hate more than supervising people in detention sessions at this school? Teacher: I am a vegan. Hence meat is relatively dispicable and I abhor it in general.

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Roses are red Violets are blue who are you kidding, violets are violet

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What happened when the Asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

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How do you fit 100 babies into a bucket? With a blender. How do you get them out again? With Doritos.

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What did the black father say to his daughter? you're adopted

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I always tell people " I have the heart of a child! " Then I continue "It's in a jar on my desk"

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there are 4 men in a bar talking about how well their sons are doing with their lives. But one man goes to the toilet. So the first man says 'my son is doing really well he is the head of a airline company and for christmas he got his bestfriend a plane.' The second man says' My son is doing really well he has his own car brand and for christmas he got his bestfriend a brand new car.' The third man says' Well my son is doing really well, He owns his own housing estate business and for christmas he bought his best friend a 250'000 sq foot mansion. The fourth man comes out of the toilet and all the three men say ' We are talking about how our sons are doing in their lives so what about yours.' The fourth man goes' well my son is gay but its not that bad because for christmas his three boyfriends got him a new plane, a new car and a 250'000 sq foot mansion.'

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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