There once was a man from Nantucket. He said it was a great place to retire.

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Why didn't the blonde laugh at my blonde joke? She's dead. She should of laughed at my jokes more.

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What do you call a dead blonde in a closet? A rape victim.

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What happended to the family in the hurricane? They died stupid

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How do you make a plumber cry? Make his family cry!!!!!!!!!

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Poopsack Jones

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Yeah, totally.

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why cant the black man vote? because hes not 18 yet.

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why cant blondes water ski.......... because whenever they split their legs they feel somthing wet

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I own a lawn mower Can you swim?

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How do you punish Helen Keller? Set a restriction on something she enjoys that is equal to the degree of her misbehavior.

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AVI IS A FAG

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A police man, doctor and stage actor walk into a bar. They're identifying the corpse of the stage actor's brother.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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When life gives you lemons,you say thank you.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? New Kids on the Block. Wait, who?

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I walked in on my daughter masturbating. The whole ordeal was very uncomfortable, but I sat her down at the dining table to discreetly explain the necessity of locking doors.

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Why couldn't little Johnny drive the tractor? Because he had no arms. Why didn't he have any arms? Because he was a potato

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Shit I forgot to put the slash. Thang god for google

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Your dad is so dumb he tried to put M&M's in abc order

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Why don't I ever lmao? Because my ass got bitten off by a bear.

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How many dead babies can fit in a bathtub. Twelve. A previous joke said seventeen, that person had their facts wrong. I know from experience

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Why did a monkey fall out of a tree? He was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of a tree? Gravity. Why did the third monkey fall out of a tree? He was stapled to the second monkey.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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