Whats worse than meeting kim kardashian? everything shes the hottest freakin celeb there is

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What did Santa get for a young boy? A gun. What did Santa get for the young boys sister? Nothing, the boy shot Santa. Who sent out presents the next Christmas? Not Santa.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

why did the baby cross the road? i stapled his head to a chicken!

thumb_up thumb_down +33

How come Pluto and Goofy are both dogs, but Goofy can talk and Pluto can't? Goofy sold Pluto into slavery in exchange for the power of human speech.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why couldn't the 10 year old see the Pirate Movie? Because he was dead...

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasn't. Numbers don't have emotion.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What happened to the dying kangaroo? He died What animal is not in the lion king? Kangaroo --why? Because he died...

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What do you call a bird with wings? Redundant.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A baby seal walks into a club...

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A black man, an Asian man, and a white man are stranded in the wilderness after their plane crashed. The black man has a flashlight, the Asian a bottle of water, and the white man a can of beans. They put their racial differences aside to increase chance of survival but were eaten by a pack of coyotes.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What is the most effective abstinence plan? There is none.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A man walks into a bar, then he realized he didn't have any money, so he walked out.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimers Who are you?

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Yo mama so fat she has an increased risk of blood clots!

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What begins with "f" and ends with "uck"? A curse word.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Mean while... at Jerry Sandusky's house

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Wanna Hear A Joke ? Afgan

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer lacked basic fence mending skills

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Babies are like landmines; when you step on them they explode.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

women have rights

thumb_up thumb_down +25

your mom is so old she was put in an old age home

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's black and white and red all over? A black, white, and red painting.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops