Whats Asian and longer than 2 inches? chopsticks.

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roses are flowers violets are too violets are purple not fuing blue

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What did mr. Mackey say to his class. It's easy mkay

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What did Steven Hawking say to God after he died? Nothing. He can't talk.

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Beans beans, they're good for your heart, the more you eat the less at risk you become to such health problems as diabetes and heart attacks. The increased carbohydrates and antioxidant properties maintain a manageable balance for the body's digestive system to maintain a good constant internal environment.

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What did the one man say to the other? Nothing, they didn't know eachother

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in the begining... god made some stuff

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What is a bear's favorite televison show? It doesnt have one because it is a bear which makes watching television an illogical fallacy.

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What did the otter say to the pumpkin? I'm so glad I'm a walrus

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How do you know a dude is dead? He doesn't breath, he has no color in the face and his heart has stoped.

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what did the cancer patient get for christmas. -an amputation. Luckily, he was cured of cancer due to the amputation, but died 3 days later in a tragic car accident

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Your mother is so white that when she goes to the beach she has to wear sunscrean to avoid being badly sun burned.

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whats worse than the halocaust? disney channel.

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Timmy stop making noises while mommy is working. I have to finish these TPS reports or else my boss will be very mad at me and we won't have Christmas again.

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Roses are red Violets are blue who are you kidding, violets are violet

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How many jews can you fit in a car? That depends on the volume of the car and the size of the people involved - different cars are of different sizes and can fit a different number of people. For instance, you could probably fit more than 20 midget jews in a van but you could probably not fit as many overweight jews in a coupé. However if you put some effort into getting as many standard sized people, in this case jews for reasons unknown, into a standard size sedan you should be able to fit about seven or eight in the car itself and one in the trunk, making a total of nine or ten.

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What does a person say before they die? Whatever their last word is

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What's worse than your mother dying in a car crash? Your father dying in the same crash.

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What did the tourist in Africa get? A souvenior.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs sitting on your couch? My brother.

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so he says "aaahhh". then i threw a fridge at him

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Nah

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i like my women like i like my coffee...big boobs

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The mouse and the elephant went to take a bath. They had a nice time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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