Is this Chick-fil-a? No, this is Joe.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

How did the guy in a wheelchair get up 7 flights of stairs? He didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 6 was racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What do you get when you cross a grizzly bear and a dolphin? Well, the odds of these two animals mating are slim to none. Due to the undeniable fact that dolphins live in the ocean primarily in the warmer tropical waters and grizzly bears live on land in the pacific northwest where the water would be too cold for the dolphin anyway. The dolphin would be swimming around avoiding sharks and the bear would probably be eating a salmon. But if they did breed you would get a dolphinbear. Although a dolphinbear would have a very low chance of survival given it's part dolphin. Dolphins are pussies.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

what is the difference between a black person and a picnic bench? A picnic bench can support a family.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the 40 year old man quickly close his web page when his wife called his name? Because he had to leave.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

I was once raped by an Asian... it didnt hurt

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How did the lifegaurd break his leg? He was hit by a submarine!

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q: What's the similarity between puzzles and women? A: Prior to the 1920's neither had the right to vote.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What's the difference between a black man with a pie and an asian with an apple. They're of different ethnicitiesand cultures, and are holding different foods.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call five dogs with no balls? Five bitches.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second elephant fall out of the tree? Because it was attached to the first elephant. Why did the third elephant fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Q: Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? A: Because she is a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

An eggo waffle had three friends that he will be inviting to his Superman birthday party. WHich friend will get the first piece of cake? Nobody the party was canceled.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Wats wet and salty and people on the west coast get covered in it? Sweat.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because once it had inadvertently escaped the farm it was being kept on it was startled and with no concept of road and pavement happened to traverse a road, with no real motive.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

I pissed myself the other day in Harrods when I saw a Somalian boy run up to a curtain saying mummy.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How do you make a mail man cry? Run him over with a forklift.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Knock Knock No one answers....

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Roses are red Violets are blue I own a lawn mower Can you swim?

thumb_up thumb_down +17

If you are going down the road in your boat and the pedal falls off how many cheese burgers can you eat 21 because a motorcycle doesnt have doors.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Roses are green Violets are yellow Those are the wrong colors oh well who gives a shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Google Doodles

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Yeah, totally.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops