Roses are bacon Violets are red I have a gun I'm not very original.

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- I did your mom last night! - Thanks, Dad.

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a man walked into a bar, however the bar was in Pakistan so he got shot by terrorists

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Whats the difference between a watermelon and a black person? Ones fun to hit with a baseball bat, and ones a watermelon.

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What did the bartender say to the midget as he entered the bar? Nothing besides attempting to serve him in the same manner as any other reveller whilst attempting to disguise his sense of pity for the midget's debilitating and somewhat stigmatised condition.

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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What is 69? A number that is before 70 and after 68

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A small child and a pedophile are walking hand-in-hand through the dark, creaky woods. "Mister," says the small child, " I'm scared." "YOU'RE scared?" says the pedophile. "I'M the one who's gonna have to walk back alone!"

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Q: What's funnier than 24? A: 25.

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How do you confuse a blonde? You tell em a AntiJoke!

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Knock Knock Who is it? Me, I forgot my keys on the way out oh ok...

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Why did Suzy fall of the swing? -she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzy

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What do you call five dogs with no balls? Five bitches.

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

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What does a girl get from a dead MAN:)?? Nothing he is dead.

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Whats the difference between peanut butter and jam? I can't peanut butter my dick into someones ass

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how do u get a nun off the bottom of a cruise ship you untie her

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What is white, wet, sticky, and gets squished out? Glue obviously, wait.... What were you thinking of?

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Farmer Ned chased his chickens before they laid their eggs, because he likes his eggs scrambled.

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what's worse than one scoop of ice crea falling on the floor? - the holocaust what's worse than two scoops of ice cream falling on the floor? - nothing

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What do you give a Penn State waterboy for Halloween - Candy

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yo mama is so fat she went to the doctor and the doctor told her she had diabetes

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whats worse than fining 7 dead babies in 1 trash can? finding 1 dead baby in 7 trashcans!

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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