Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

Roses are red. Violets are red. Everything is red. I soaked it in the blood of small children.

There once was a man from Nantucket, whose dick was so long he could provide women with more pleasure than the average male.

What's the deal with airline food? It's nourishing matter that sustains life, provides energy, and promotes growth distributed by flight attendants.

Why was johny late to school? He died

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Why did the blonde buy a condom? Because she had a penis.

Why did the chicken cross the road? it didn't it was being sexually abused by its father.

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest is a former alcoholic, and has the strength to turn around and leave.

What turns red and explodes in a microwave A cat

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it noticed that there may be foodstuffs on other side.

A British man walks into a dental office.

Do you want to hear a joke? Yes? Well that's probably why you came to this site.

What did the man say to his son? Hello, son.

whats stupid and likes dumb jokes? you.

Q: What happens when you throw a green rock in the Red Sea? A: It gets wet.

-How do you pull a prank on Helen Keller? -Stick a plunger in the toilet!

Whats worse than meeting kim kardashian? everything shes the hottest freakin celeb there is

Jacob Edwards has friends.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasn't. Numbers don't have emotion.

what did the ruler say to the other ruler your a ruler

Whats worst than being attacked by a tiger? Being attacked by 2 tigers.

why did the baby cross the road? i stapled his head to a chicken!

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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