What's funnier than a dead baby? A lot of things. Dead babies are not funny.

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Everything is red. I soaked it in the blood of small children.

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Why was johny late to school? He died

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Why did little susie fall off the swing? because she had no arms. Knock knock who's there? not susie

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hi

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Your landlord, clear out your stuff by tuesday"

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest is a former alcoholic, and has the strength to turn around and leave.

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RULES: #1) have fun #2) safety first

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why did the baby cross the road? i stapled his head to a chicken!

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What did Santa get for a young boy? A gun. What did Santa get for the young boys sister? Nothing, the boy shot Santa. Who sent out presents the next Christmas? Not Santa.

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-How do you pull a prank on Helen Keller? -Stick a plunger in the toilet!

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How many jews can you fit in a car? However many seats there are

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What happened to the dying kangaroo? He died What animal is not in the lion king? Kangaroo --why? Because he died...

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How come Pluto and Goofy are both dogs, but Goofy can talk and Pluto can't? Goofy sold Pluto into slavery in exchange for the power of human speech.

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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Why do black people cuss so much? Because f#*% you.

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A man walks into a bar, then he realized he didn't have any money, so he walked out.

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What is the most effective abstinence plan? There is none.

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A baby seal walks into a club...

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Mean while... at Jerry Sandusky's house

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimers Who are you?

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What begins with "f" and ends with "uck"? A curse word.

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Yo mama so fat she has an increased risk of blood clots!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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